1
00:00:00,780 --> 00:00:03,060
Show me that smile again.

2
00:00:04,660 --> 00:00:08,520
Don't waste another minute on your
crying.

3
00:00:08,980 --> 00:00:11,340
We're nowhere near the end.

4
00:00:12,020 --> 00:00:14,660
The wind that is ready to begin.

5
00:01:02,920 --> 00:01:05,980
Look, Jennifer, it's not that I don't
want to go with you Saturday. It's just

6
00:01:05,980 --> 00:01:07,280
that I've got this prior commitment.

7
00:01:08,620 --> 00:01:10,300
Uh, I'm donating a kidney.

8
00:01:12,520 --> 00:01:14,080
Uh, look, but don't tell anybody.

9
00:01:15,400 --> 00:01:17,040
Well, because then everybody will want
one.

10
00:01:18,700 --> 00:01:20,580
Look, if the deal falls through, I'll
let you know.

11
00:01:21,360 --> 00:01:22,720
Okay. All right, bye -bye.

12
00:01:23,820 --> 00:01:26,120
You turned down a date with Jennifer
Miller?

13
00:01:27,320 --> 00:01:29,500
Jennifer Wonderbuns Miller?

14
00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:34,370
My attraction to women is not entirely
based on physical beauty.

15
00:01:34,750 --> 00:01:36,550
Yeah, they gotta be stupid, too.

16
00:01:38,110 --> 00:01:39,790
Mike, I thought you liked Jennifer.

17
00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:43,410
Yeah, but she wants me to do something
I'd never do in a million years.

18
00:01:43,790 --> 00:01:44,950
What? Read a book?

19
00:01:45,730 --> 00:01:46,730
No, worse.

20
00:01:47,190 --> 00:01:51,350
She wants me to go to her sister's
wedding and go ballroom dancing.

21
00:01:52,170 --> 00:01:55,210
As God is our witness, I can't make our
baby do this.

22
00:01:57,230 --> 00:02:00,530
Okay, fine, fine. You guys go ahead and
laugh, but Michael Seaver's not going to

23
00:02:00,530 --> 00:02:02,710
make a fool of himself in front of 200
people.

24
00:02:03,130 --> 00:02:05,230
Yeah, you're used to a much bigger
crowd.

25
00:02:06,670 --> 00:02:10,130
Mike, there are advantages to ballroom
dancing. You know, you actually get to

26
00:02:10,130 --> 00:02:16,610
touch your partner hand to hand, cheek
to cheek, everything else to everything

27
00:02:16,610 --> 00:02:17,870
else. Oh, jeez.

28
00:02:19,330 --> 00:02:23,610
And if you're a real cool guy, then you
learn all the moves, Mike.

29
00:02:24,010 --> 00:02:28,990
Well, the right guy and the right moves
can absolutely make the right woman...

30
00:02:28,990 --> 00:02:30,410
melt.

31
00:02:31,610 --> 00:02:34,430
There are more moves, but they require a
motel room.

32
00:02:35,270 --> 00:02:36,390
No, not so.

33
00:02:37,490 --> 00:02:42,550
Observe... the French dip.

34
00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:46,310
There are more moves, but they require a
grave.

35
00:02:50,930 --> 00:02:52,730
Yeah, Jennifer, Mike.

36
00:02:53,310 --> 00:02:54,310
Look, the deal fell through.

37
00:02:55,450 --> 00:02:58,550
I don't know. Apparently there's a real
glut on the world kidney market.

38
00:02:59,390 --> 00:03:01,570
Yeah, so, um, we're on for the wedding.

39
00:03:02,290 --> 00:03:03,350
Yeah, and I'll bring the gravy.

40
00:03:04,110 --> 00:03:05,650
Never mind. It's a dancing tour.

41
00:03:06,250 --> 00:03:07,168
Yeah, okay.

42
00:03:07,170 --> 00:03:08,170
Bye -bye.

43
00:03:08,710 --> 00:03:09,710
All right, Mike.

44
00:03:10,030 --> 00:03:10,969
All right, Dad.

45
00:03:10,970 --> 00:03:14,870
You know, I'm going to make her melt. I
have never seen Wonder Buns melt before.

46
00:03:19,510 --> 00:03:21,490
Wait a minute. I don't even know how to
dance.

47
00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:24,520
Oh, that's all right. No problem. Come
on over here. Give it a try.

48
00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:28,720
Not with me.

49
00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:33,180
What's she trying to do? Is she trying
to glide?

50
00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:41,540
That's it. I've had it. Man can only
take so much.

51
00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:44,380
Something wrong, Ben?

52
00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:49,820
The new coach and the stupid son of
Rodney. The kid tripped me three times

53
00:03:49,820 --> 00:03:50,820
with the stick.

54
00:03:51,920 --> 00:03:53,980
practice, that kid is going to be
sucking the pot.

55
00:03:55,440 --> 00:03:58,640
Now, I don't want to hear that, Ben. If
you have a problem with one of your

56
00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,720
teammates, fighting is not the answer.

57
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:02,860
Ben, what are you doing?

58
00:04:03,180 --> 00:04:04,180
Pumping milk.

59
00:04:04,360 --> 00:04:06,060
Hey, work for Schwarzenegger.

60
00:04:06,420 --> 00:04:11,940
Now, wait a minute. Did you try telling
the coach that Rodney tripped you?

61
00:04:12,460 --> 00:04:14,020
The coach saw the whole thing.

62
00:04:14,500 --> 00:04:18,279
Now, come on. You mean to tell me that
the coach actually told Rodney to play

63
00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:20,560
dirty? He tells all the kids to play
dirty.

64
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:21,920
That's why he hates me.

65
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:26,040
It's common knowledge. I'm a finesse
player.

66
00:04:28,460 --> 00:04:29,560
Well, that's it, Ben.

67
00:04:29,780 --> 00:04:32,800
I was afraid this hockey thing was going
to be too rough.

68
00:04:33,180 --> 00:04:34,820
Jason, I think you should quit the team.

69
00:04:35,140 --> 00:04:38,640
No, Maggie, that's not fair to Ben. Just
because the coach is out of line, you

70
00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:39,640
can't make him quit.

71
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:42,760
I'll go down to the next practice, I'll
meet the guy, and we'll talk it all

72
00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:44,860
over. If that's okay with you, Ben.

73
00:04:45,140 --> 00:04:46,140
Yeah, thank you.

74
00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:49,910
and while you keep the coach busy
talking, I'll go and skate over Rodney's

75
00:04:55,910 --> 00:04:58,550
Come on, girls.

76
00:04:58,850 --> 00:05:00,930
This is hockey, not a square dance.

77
00:05:01,270 --> 00:05:03,170
I want to see some contact out there.

78
00:05:04,010 --> 00:05:07,110
Remember, just because you're wearing
skates doesn't mean you can't kick.

79
00:05:11,080 --> 00:05:14,300
I'm Jason Siebert. Coach Brockton. How
are you? That's my boy Ben out there,

80
00:05:14,340 --> 00:05:15,079
number seven.

81
00:05:15,080 --> 00:05:16,600
Yeah, he could use another 40 pounds.

82
00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:20,500
Well, no problem. I'll get him started
on steroids right away. Good.

83
00:05:20,980 --> 00:05:22,540
I like to see the parents get involved.

84
00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:28,280
Kelly! Kelly!

85
00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:32,460
You should have passed off. That's going
to cost you. Sure. Make him skate a few

86
00:05:32,460 --> 00:05:34,000
extra laps after practice, huh?

87
00:05:35,940 --> 00:05:37,580
Do you have change for five, coach?

88
00:05:37,800 --> 00:05:41,280
What are you talking about, change? You
missed the open man. That is fine.

89
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:42,500
Take a lap.

90
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:47,580
You're finding these kids?

91
00:05:48,120 --> 00:05:50,400
Hey, that is not a first -time offender.

92
00:05:51,880 --> 00:05:53,860
Too bad they outlawed the death penalty.

93
00:05:55,220 --> 00:05:56,220
Yeah.

94
00:05:58,740 --> 00:06:02,520
Carmelo, you call that a check? My wife
hit harder on our honeymoon.

95
00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:05,020
Could you marry Wayne Gretzky?

96
00:06:06,190 --> 00:06:07,450
You're calling me a homosexual?

97
00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:11,210
Oh, but I do think your coaching methods
are a little offensive.

98
00:06:11,690 --> 00:06:13,710
Hey, I never had a losing season, buddy.

99
00:06:14,130 --> 00:06:15,790
Well, congratulations, buddy.

100
00:06:16,290 --> 00:06:19,310
But I think what's important for these
kids is they learn something. They have

101
00:06:19,310 --> 00:06:20,229
little fun.

102
00:06:20,230 --> 00:06:22,350
Not win, win, win at all costs.

103
00:06:23,530 --> 00:06:24,970
That's how we lost Vietnam.

104
00:06:25,990 --> 00:06:27,850
You're a wimp, Siva. Oh, really?

105
00:06:28,390 --> 00:06:29,590
Well, you know what you are.

106
00:06:29,790 --> 00:06:34,030
Yeah? You're taking a lot of sublimated
anger and you're displacing it on these

107
00:06:34,030 --> 00:06:35,030
kids.

108
00:06:35,790 --> 00:06:38,110
You sound like you've been to one of
them wussy shrinks.

109
00:06:39,210 --> 00:06:41,230
I am one of them wussy shrinks.

110
00:06:42,370 --> 00:06:43,690
I mean, I'm a psychiatrist.

111
00:06:43,930 --> 00:06:47,090
And just because you're a little self
-absorbed and narrow -minded... Hey, who

112
00:06:47,090 --> 00:06:51,290
are you calling self -absorbent? You
better be ready to back that up, pal.

113
00:06:51,290 --> 00:06:52,530
your hands off me, okay?

114
00:06:52,850 --> 00:06:53,409
Hey, I'm down.

115
00:06:53,410 --> 00:06:55,670
Ben, that's not the way mature people
deal with... I'm mature enough.

116
00:06:57,970 --> 00:06:58,970
One,

117
00:07:01,870 --> 00:07:04,610
two, three, right. One, two, three.

118
00:07:07,369 --> 00:07:10,030
Mike, that's the fifth time in the last
half hour.

119
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:12,150
Hey, I'm getting better.

120
00:07:13,170 --> 00:07:16,230
Good. Then let's call it a night. I've
got an article to finish.

121
00:07:16,710 --> 00:07:19,570
Come on, Mom. The wedding's tomorrow
night. I need to practice.

122
00:07:19,930 --> 00:07:20,930
Honey, you're doing fine.

123
00:07:21,450 --> 00:07:23,350
Besides, I've got to change the bandages
on my feet.

124
00:07:25,110 --> 00:07:26,730
Come on. I barely broke the skin.

125
00:07:33,510 --> 00:07:34,510
You know,

126
00:07:35,470 --> 00:07:37,530
and wonder, what's more beautiful?

127
00:07:37,970 --> 00:07:42,530
The glimmering stars on a clear night or
this face?

128
00:07:43,290 --> 00:07:45,590
I get it. I'm not dancing with you.

129
00:07:45,910 --> 00:07:48,270
Come on, Carol. I'm not going to step on
your feet.

130
00:07:48,530 --> 00:07:50,030
You stepped all over Mom's.

131
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:53,410
Carol, the woman has huge feet.

132
00:07:55,330 --> 00:07:58,450
And just between you and me, Mom can't
dance.

133
00:07:58,930 --> 00:08:00,210
You're such a jerk.

134
00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:02,530
You're right. I am.

135
00:08:03,810 --> 00:08:05,590
No, no, no, no. Really, I am.

136
00:08:06,910 --> 00:08:13,370
And that's why I'm so incredibly
fortunate to have a sister who's not

137
00:08:13,370 --> 00:08:15,730
sister, but, well, a saint.

138
00:08:16,310 --> 00:08:20,050
That's why I think I'll call you Saint
Sister Carol.

139
00:08:20,590 --> 00:08:21,590
No, no.

140
00:08:21,770 --> 00:08:24,210
Sister Saint Carol. No, I got it.

141
00:08:24,590 --> 00:08:28,210
Carol Saint Sister. Because after all,
Carol, you are... Oh, right, right.

142
00:08:28,410 --> 00:08:30,370
I'd rather lose a foot than listen to
this.

143
00:08:37,260 --> 00:08:38,260
Glide two, three.

144
00:08:38,419 --> 00:08:42,720
Glide two, three. Glide two, three. Hey,
this is sort of neat.

145
00:08:44,380 --> 00:08:47,880
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Carol, what are you
doing?

146
00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,160
Dancing. Carol, this is not interpretive
dancing.

147
00:08:51,420 --> 00:08:54,500
This is ballroom dancing. The man is
supposed to lead.

148
00:08:54,800 --> 00:08:57,940
The woman is supposed to be limp, okay?

149
00:08:58,560 --> 00:08:59,560
Whatever you say.

150
00:09:00,080 --> 00:09:01,640
Okay, let's try it again.

151
00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:06,380
And glide two, three. Oh, come on,
Carol. This isn't limp. That's...

152
00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:07,750
It's dead.

153
00:09:08,050 --> 00:09:09,750
Just following your lead.

154
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:11,550
Try it again.

155
00:09:12,910 --> 00:09:15,910
Glide to... Hey, Mike, you're doing
better.

156
00:09:17,090 --> 00:09:18,090
Glide...

157
00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:40,830
Well, I guess you could say Coach
Brockton and I had a brief but

158
00:09:40,830 --> 00:09:42,050
exchange of ideas.

159
00:09:42,330 --> 00:09:43,330
And fists.

160
00:09:43,550 --> 00:09:45,010
Dad whooped him good.

161
00:09:45,230 --> 00:09:46,270
All right, Dad.

162
00:09:47,190 --> 00:09:49,590
Jason, you mean you actually got in a
fight with the coach?

163
00:09:49,890 --> 00:09:52,690
Well, he took a swing at me, Maggie. I
had to defend myself.

164
00:09:53,270 --> 00:09:55,350
Well, I better get some eyes for that
eye.

165
00:09:56,130 --> 00:09:59,930
Mike, you should have seen it. Fell,
bang, boom.

166
00:10:00,630 --> 00:10:02,190
Brockton never had a chance.

167
00:10:03,550 --> 00:10:06,510
And we're here at ringside with Jason.

168
00:10:06,890 --> 00:10:11,370
The animal's fever. And along with us at
ringside is the animal's manager,

169
00:10:11,730 --> 00:10:16,650
Benjamin Bugsy -Sever. Tell us, Bugsy,
how did you get the chance blood

170
00:10:16,650 --> 00:10:17,730
for today's ballot?

171
00:10:17,990 --> 00:10:20,110
I showed him his oldest son's report
card.

172
00:10:21,470 --> 00:10:23,550
Well, animal, what's next?

173
00:10:23,830 --> 00:10:28,810
Well, I want Holmes, and then I want
Norton, and then I want... And then I'm

174
00:10:28,810 --> 00:10:31,850
going to retire to pursue psychiatry
full -time.

175
00:10:32,730 --> 00:10:35,890
Jason, you're going to make the kids
think fighting is a good thing.

176
00:10:36,880 --> 00:10:37,880
You're right.

177
00:10:37,980 --> 00:10:39,060
I'll talk to them.

178
00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:43,180
Boys, what I did today was
reprehensible.

179
00:10:43,880 --> 00:10:46,560
Fighting is not the best way to solve
your problems.

180
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:48,660
I want that to be clear.

181
00:10:49,620 --> 00:10:50,620
Thank you.

182
00:10:55,240 --> 00:10:56,640
Thank you.

183
00:11:00,700 --> 00:11:06,100
I just don't think I should have to
spend another 24 hours making excuses

184
00:11:06,100 --> 00:11:07,490
what... Happened yesterday.

185
00:11:07,750 --> 00:11:10,090
You can't, because there is no excuse.

186
00:11:10,410 --> 00:11:14,390
You fought like a barbarian, and then
you gloated like a child.

187
00:11:15,290 --> 00:11:17,370
You're a baby barbarian.

188
00:11:17,670 --> 00:11:21,430
Oh, I see. So you're saying by that one
incident, I'm turning our son into

189
00:11:21,430 --> 00:11:22,630
another Rambo?

190
00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:24,790
Hi, honey, I'm home.

191
00:11:26,310 --> 00:11:27,550
Oh, my God.

192
00:11:33,950 --> 00:11:34,950
Come on, Ben.

193
00:11:35,280 --> 00:11:36,980
Sit down. Tell us exactly what happened.

194
00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:42,680
Right. I was sitting in the cafeteria
eating my Salisbury steak, mashed

195
00:11:42,680 --> 00:11:47,380
potatoes, and something that looked like
either broccoli or astroturf.

196
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:49,760
Ben, the fight.

197
00:11:50,960 --> 00:11:55,780
Yeah, that's when Rodney Brockton walked
over and pulled me out of my chair.

198
00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:57,640
Rodney Brockton.

199
00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:03,660
Yeah, I said, Rodney, I don't know what
makes me sicker, you or...

200
00:12:08,170 --> 00:12:09,089
would have done.

201
00:12:09,090 --> 00:12:11,110
I gave him a knuckle sandwich.

202
00:12:12,950 --> 00:12:15,030
Well, Animal, are you proud of yourself?

203
00:12:16,390 --> 00:12:17,950
No, Maggie, I'm not proud.

204
00:12:19,850 --> 00:12:22,330
Ben, uh, is Rodney okay?

205
00:12:23,150 --> 00:12:25,890
Yeah, Miss Finkel came and broke it up.

206
00:12:26,150 --> 00:12:31,330
But tomorrow at high noon we meet under
the monkey bars and only one of us makes

207
00:12:31,330 --> 00:12:32,470
it to the fourth grade.

208
00:12:34,270 --> 00:12:35,750
Well, I've had enough of it.

209
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:37,760
I'm going down to talk to Brockton
myself.

210
00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:43,380
No, no, Maggie, I started this whole
thing, so I guess it's time that I

211
00:12:43,380 --> 00:12:46,140
Ben how a real man fights his battles.

212
00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:47,940
All right, Dad!

213
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:50,000
Come on, Ben.

214
00:12:53,620 --> 00:12:56,900
Now, let's say you're mixing it up in
the corner. The ref isn't looking.

215
00:12:57,560 --> 00:12:58,560
What do you do?

216
00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:02,240
Rodney, demonstrate.

217
00:13:02,440 --> 00:13:03,440
Okay, Dad.

218
00:13:10,209 --> 00:13:13,970
Perfect. Now, in a game, you make sure
you follow that up with a punch, huh?

219
00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:18,510
Excuse me, coach, but isn't this
illegal?

220
00:13:20,130 --> 00:13:22,970
This is hockey, kid. You want legal? Go
to law school.

221
00:13:23,190 --> 00:13:24,190
Okay,

222
00:13:26,510 --> 00:13:30,190
so who makes the first move? I do. You
just follow my lead. Gotcha.

223
00:13:31,190 --> 00:13:32,490
Dad, look who's here.

224
00:13:33,390 --> 00:13:36,270
What are you doing here, Siva? Your kid
was cut from the team.

225
00:13:36,930 --> 00:13:40,550
Well, Coach, I'd like to talk to you. I
know I said some pretty insulting things

226
00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:42,630
the other day, and today there's
something else I'd like to say.

227
00:13:43,370 --> 00:13:45,950
Might I suggest drop dead chicken lips?

228
00:13:46,290 --> 00:13:48,450
Ben, let me handle this.

229
00:13:50,350 --> 00:13:51,770
Mr. Brockton, I'm sorry.

230
00:13:52,050 --> 00:13:53,190
I came to apologize.

231
00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:55,890
No way, Thiever. I owe you one.

232
00:13:56,090 --> 00:13:56,989
Come on.

233
00:13:56,990 --> 00:13:57,829
Come on.

234
00:13:57,830 --> 00:13:59,550
Look, I didn't come here to fight.

235
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:04,540
I didn't mean to say or do anything to
offend you. You said I was married to

236
00:14:04,540 --> 00:14:07,300
Wayne Gretzky. Now, I'm not going to
take that thing.

237
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:12,740
I didn't mean to say seriously that you
were married to Wayne Gretzky. Oh, so

238
00:14:12,740 --> 00:14:16,900
you're saying we lived in sin? I didn't
mean to imply that you had any

239
00:14:16,900 --> 00:14:21,180
relationship whatsoever. Oh, I get it.
So now Wayne is too good for me, huh?

240
00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:25,520
I'm not talking about... Look, if you're
just... Look, if you just want another

241
00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:28,120
excuse to fight... I don't need any
excuses. Come on.

242
00:14:28,780 --> 00:14:32,740
How come you're... isn't rolling up his
sleeves. Once he starts flexing all his

243
00:14:32,740 --> 00:14:34,740
muscles, his shirt pops off by itself.

244
00:14:36,200 --> 00:14:40,320
It's rematch time, Siva. Now, you want
me to start it? I'll start it. Okay, you

245
00:14:40,320 --> 00:14:43,480
want to hit me? Go ahead. Fine, hit me.
I'm not worried about me. I'm not

246
00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:44,800
worried about you. It's these kids.

247
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:49,300
If we can't teach our children that
fighting is not the answer, then we have

248
00:14:49,300 --> 00:14:50,300
failed.

249
00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:52,260
As parents and as human beings.

250
00:14:53,180 --> 00:14:54,220
So come on, you can hit me.

251
00:14:54,860 --> 00:14:56,380
Or you can shake my hand.

252
00:14:57,700 --> 00:14:58,700
Choice is yours.

253
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:06,920
Siva.

254
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:11,520
Nell built him down.

255
00:15:12,420 --> 00:15:15,160
Yeah, that's right, wuss. Come on, show
the kid what you really made out of him.

256
00:15:19,880 --> 00:15:21,200
Come on, Ben, we're going home.

257
00:15:23,180 --> 00:15:24,180
What?

258
00:15:36,430 --> 00:15:38,250
Move on. Jennifer's going to be here in
ten minutes.

259
00:15:38,630 --> 00:15:40,210
Oh, my God. I still have to shower.

260
00:15:41,590 --> 00:15:42,590
And shave.

261
00:15:43,850 --> 00:15:45,750
Gee, it's another month already?

262
00:15:47,630 --> 00:15:53,030
And glide two, three. Glide two, three.
Glide two, three. Glide two, three.

263
00:15:54,910 --> 00:15:56,530
Oh, my God. I've got to sit.

264
00:16:10,760 --> 00:16:11,760
And what happened?

265
00:16:12,380 --> 00:16:16,280
Well, Coach Brockton called me a wimp,
and then he punched me as hard as he

266
00:16:16,280 --> 00:16:17,280
could in the stomach.

267
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:19,800
Now comes the rough part of the evening.

268
00:16:28,180 --> 00:16:31,020
Ben, Ben, milk is not the answer.

269
00:16:32,420 --> 00:16:34,720
I can't believe you chickened out today.

270
00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:36,120
Now, hold on right there.

271
00:16:36,380 --> 00:16:38,280
A lot of kids would get spanked for
that.

272
00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:39,660
Oh, sure. Hit me.

273
00:16:40,370 --> 00:16:43,690
Okay. Hey, I was just trying to make a
point. Yeah.

274
00:16:44,210 --> 00:16:46,890
So you think I should have fought with
Coach Brockton today, huh?

275
00:16:47,110 --> 00:16:48,310
He slugged you, Dad.

276
00:16:48,730 --> 00:16:51,970
Yeah, and because he's slugged me, I
guess I should have slugged him right

277
00:16:52,650 --> 00:16:55,410
You gotta admit, there's a certain logic
to it.

278
00:16:56,830 --> 00:16:59,130
Ben, do you remember how this whole
thing got started?

279
00:16:59,770 --> 00:17:00,770
Rodney tripped me.

280
00:17:01,430 --> 00:17:04,450
Rodney tripped you, and that's why I
went down to talk to the coach, and we

281
00:17:04,450 --> 00:17:05,869
ended up punching each other up.

282
00:17:06,349 --> 00:17:07,770
Now, did that solve anything?

283
00:17:09,349 --> 00:17:10,349
to watch.

284
00:17:11,490 --> 00:17:16,290
Yeah, and because I fought with the
coach the very next day, you and Rodney

285
00:17:16,290 --> 00:17:16,809
it out.

286
00:17:16,810 --> 00:17:18,190
Did that solve anything?

287
00:17:18,950 --> 00:17:20,750
No, that's why we went down there today.

288
00:17:21,230 --> 00:17:23,430
Okay, so suppose I had punched him back.

289
00:17:23,770 --> 00:17:25,510
Would that have solved anything?

290
00:17:25,930 --> 00:17:30,250
Yeah, because he would have had two
broken arms, two broken legs, a fat lip,

291
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,470
he wouldn't be coaching anymore.

292
00:17:32,330 --> 00:17:33,930
No, he wouldn't be coaching anymore.

293
00:17:35,110 --> 00:17:38,990
But he'd go out and he'd get one of
those electric wheelchairs and he'd show

294
00:17:38,990 --> 00:17:41,030
on our front lawn with a shotgun.

295
00:17:43,070 --> 00:17:44,950
Who can play that game, Dad?

296
00:17:46,050 --> 00:17:49,050
Ben, we don't have an electric
wheelchair.

297
00:17:49,430 --> 00:17:52,870
No, but we can get a machine gun and
blow Mr.

298
00:17:53,070 --> 00:17:54,510
Brockton away like in Rambo.

299
00:17:55,710 --> 00:17:57,050
Okay, all right, all right.

300
00:17:57,550 --> 00:17:58,570
Let's say we do that.

301
00:17:58,910 --> 00:18:00,270
All right, we won!

302
00:18:00,770 --> 00:18:01,770
I think you've won.

303
00:18:02,510 --> 00:18:05,690
And then you're back at home, and you're
taking a shower, and you're getting

304
00:18:05,690 --> 00:18:10,250
ready for bed, and suddenly along comes
Mrs.

305
00:18:10,670 --> 00:18:11,950
Brockton. Into our shower?

306
00:18:13,170 --> 00:18:16,250
No, into our living room. And she brings
her own machine gun.

307
00:18:16,750 --> 00:18:19,470
And she wipes out Mom and Carol.

308
00:18:20,190 --> 00:18:21,190
Oh.

309
00:18:21,490 --> 00:18:22,830
And then what do we do?

310
00:18:24,030 --> 00:18:26,290
Well, for one thing, we cook for
ourselves.

311
00:18:27,950 --> 00:18:30,690
Oh, come on, Ben. Don't you want to get
even?

312
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:33,840
We trade in the Volvo and get a tank.

313
00:18:34,100 --> 00:18:36,440
Yeah. That's good. Good, Ben.

314
00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:40,500
And then I hop into that tank and I
motor over to the Brockthams and I blow

315
00:18:40,500 --> 00:18:41,319
all away.

316
00:18:41,320 --> 00:18:42,320
Oh, right.

317
00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:43,600
But wait, Ben.

318
00:18:43,820 --> 00:18:45,660
They booby -trapped the front lawn.

319
00:18:46,060 --> 00:18:48,100
I'm sorry to hear that, Dallas. Yeah.

320
00:18:49,700 --> 00:18:55,200
So just as I'm pulling away, that tank
and your father get blown to

321
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:57,640
Oh, my gosh.

322
00:18:58,860 --> 00:18:59,860
Hmm.

323
00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:01,940
So you see what I'm getting at?

324
00:19:02,180 --> 00:19:04,640
Yeah. I've been left alone with Mike.

325
00:19:06,220 --> 00:19:10,640
No, no, because while you were brushing
your teeth, Rodney's cousins came and

326
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:11,640
took care of Mike.

327
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,440
They got Mike, too?

328
00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:17,080
So I'm all alone.

329
00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:20,440
Weird, isn't it?

330
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,260
Just a few days ago, you had a family, a
husband.

331
00:19:28,110 --> 00:19:31,850
your subscriptions to Boys Life magazine
and a few faded memories.

332
00:19:33,770 --> 00:19:35,190
But hey, it was worth it, wasn't it?

333
00:19:35,690 --> 00:19:36,970
Because we didn't chicken out.

334
00:19:37,390 --> 00:19:38,890
No, sir, we fought back.

335
00:19:40,370 --> 00:19:42,150
Do you remember how this got started
again?

336
00:19:42,830 --> 00:19:43,830
Rodney tripped me.

337
00:19:44,030 --> 00:19:45,130
Oh, yes, Rodney.

338
00:19:45,930 --> 00:19:47,910
Well, we won't have him to worry about
anymore.

339
00:19:49,290 --> 00:19:51,530
Guess we found a pretty good way to
solve your problem.

340
00:19:52,790 --> 00:19:55,250
No, we didn't, Dad. It was a stupid way.

341
00:19:56,840 --> 00:19:58,520
I need another drink. Want one?

342
00:19:59,460 --> 00:20:00,600
Sure, set them up.

343
00:20:02,360 --> 00:20:04,840
So I guess you really didn't chicken out
today, huh?

344
00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:07,780
No, I didn't chicken out, Ben.

345
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,520
I just feel that most of the time,
fighting is not the answer.

346
00:20:13,420 --> 00:20:17,420
And that whenever possible, we really
must try to find a better way.

347
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:19,680
I'll drink to that.

348
00:20:23,800 --> 00:20:24,800
You know what, Dad?

349
00:20:25,610 --> 00:20:26,610
What, Ben?

350
00:20:26,850 --> 00:20:28,930
I'm glad you didn't get blown to
Connecticut.

351
00:20:29,890 --> 00:20:31,590
So am I.

352
00:20:35,050 --> 00:20:36,210
How you doing, guys?

353
00:20:36,450 --> 00:20:37,450
Pretty good, Mom.

354
00:20:38,610 --> 00:20:40,570
Ah, that must be Jennifer.

355
00:20:41,070 --> 00:20:42,070
Poor girl.

356
00:20:42,430 --> 00:20:45,370
She's no idea what Mike's going to do to
her feet tonight.

357
00:20:48,430 --> 00:20:50,270
Jennifer, what a neat dress.

358
00:20:50,610 --> 00:20:51,610
Come on in, babe.

359
00:21:01,680 --> 00:21:02,680
You look pretty.

360
00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:03,720
Very nice.

361
00:21:04,360 --> 00:21:05,360
Jennifer.

362
00:21:12,420 --> 00:21:14,220
Mike, you look so handsome.

363
00:21:14,940 --> 00:21:17,620
Yeah, just like that waiter at the fish
restaurant.

364
00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:21,340
Mike, I got terrible news.

365
00:21:21,660 --> 00:21:22,760
The wedding's off.

366
00:21:24,360 --> 00:21:25,360
What?

367
00:21:25,780 --> 00:21:29,320
My sister caught the groom in the
confessional with her maid of honor. She

368
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:30,320
the whole thing off.

369
00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:34,300
I've been through? How could she do this
to me?

370
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:36,280
We call him Mr.

371
00:21:36,860 --> 00:21:37,860
Sensitivity.

372
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,360
Jennifer, we can't let this happen. I
want you to go over here and call your

373
00:21:41,360 --> 00:21:44,320
sister right now and talk some sense
into that girl before she throws her

374
00:21:44,320 --> 00:21:46,840
away. Mike, it's no use. It's all over.

375
00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:50,100
I'm just asking you to call her. I can't
do that.

376
00:21:51,280 --> 00:21:52,880
Well, hey, maybe she can marry somebody
else.

377
00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:54,560
Mike! Okay, okay, fine.

378
00:21:55,840 --> 00:21:56,840
Okay, come here.

379
00:21:57,120 --> 00:21:58,660
What? Just come here.

380
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:03,400
Like, I'm really not in the mood for
this.

381
00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:09,420
Somebody give me the phone.

382
00:22:13,120 --> 00:22:15,340
Maggie, I think we might have created a
monster.

383
00:22:25,900 --> 00:22:30,520
You're looking good out there, Ben. I
feel like a new man since Coach Brockton

384
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:31,520
got the boot.

385
00:22:32,580 --> 00:22:36,620
Uh -oh. Here comes the coach. It's five
laps. We're talking with the fans.

386
00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:43,360
All

387
00:22:43,360 --> 00:22:51,660
right.

388
00:22:51,740 --> 00:22:52,740
Come on, you guys.

389
00:22:52,900 --> 00:22:55,100
Let's get together here. First game
score. Let's go.